Teaching moment

Tonight we started simulating back to school routine by hitting the sack at 8pm (so we can wake up at 5am).  After lights off, I went out of the room to finish some last minute to-do items.  I didn't realize that it took me about almost two hours.  

When I re-entered the room, I was surprised that AS was still awake. 

"What took you so long mom?" He inquired.

I said that I prepared the food items for tomorrow's marketing, salary for house helpers, as well as sorting out bills ( I enumerated them one by one : Electricity, water, telephone, cable and other papers for filing as if to justify my being away 😁). 

Then AS proudly blurted out: "We're rich right?" 

I told him "Not really (as what the world defines rich) but Dad works hard and God is the one providing for our needs. What we have is enough; it is just right.

Sometimes when I find that we don't have enough, as we trust God, something amazing will happen and we will have enough! 

Remember the story I told last Sunday? About how Elijah was worried how he will eat and drink, but as he obeyed God, God provided the brook for him to drink and bread and meat delivered to him by birds. (1 Kings 16:29 -17:6) Amazing right?"

AS: "Can you tell me more about God?"

Wow, I praise God for teaching moments like this.  😊

I was the teacher last Sunday.  Even though I prepared well, I still do not have control over my students.  Last Sunday was one such "uncontrollable" situation.  I felt my lesson fell on deaf ears.  But that is to show me that God is in control; He IS in the business of transforming lives not me. I only need to obey and surrender to Him. 

Now I see that the lesson was not for naught as He used it again tonight to speak to my son's heart.  

"All Scripture is God breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness." - 2 Timothy 3:16

Princess Treatment

I woke up one Friday morning to an unusual abdominal pain.  I shrugged it off and went on with my day as the pain was tolerable for my standards.  It was mid-morning when I began to suspect something must be wrong as the pain was still persistent and I also felt all flushed with fever (uy, kinanta nya.. ^_^).


I then received a call from my son's school that he was not feeling well.  I had to drive back from where I was (Ortigas) and face the heavy traffic.  On the way home, I began praying for our health and for strength to drive.  Traffic was slow moving.  It took me about one hour to reach school and another hour going home.


"Whew".  So this is how taxi / jeepney drivers feel.


I gave a sigh of relief as we reached home.  I thanked God for His protection.  I immediately went straight to bed as I was too weak already.  My son was asleep so I asked our helper to bring him to his room.


I was feverish with 38.8C temperature accompanied with chills.


After a while, AS (who was feeling better already) went in my room.  I told him not to go near me as I have fever.  He was persistent that he wanted to be with me.  He lay on my bed but with a significant amount of distance apart from me.  He just wanted to be there.  Later, I allowed him to touch my forehead at the same time as his. He said I was "hotter than him".


I was wearing a blanket because I was feeling cold.  He went out the room and came back with two more blankets!  Then he did the sweetest.. He thoughtfully laid the blankets over my body.  He went out again and reappeared with a bowl of sliced apples (with our helper's help) and tiny white flowers (from the garden).  I feel so special!


AS:  "Mom I'll get you water." He went down and back again with my water bottle filled to the brim. I feel so loved!  He did all these without me telling him.


I expressed my gratitude, affirmed his kind actions and told him I love him.


Times like this I feel like a princess, what with three boys surrounding me in the family.  (But most of the time, I am a prince.  Just one-of-the-boys, when I get down and dirty, rough and rugged!) I am just thankful that AS got his sweet side through his dad's modelling of love.


Yes our children are watching us.  A huge factor of how they will turn out as adults someday are influenced by us parents. That is a great responsibility!  I too often find myself making mistakes and having misgivings in raising our children ( who doesn't?).  That is why I am so glad that the role we have as parents is not ours to play alone... we have God with us on this journey.


Jesus said: "A student is not above his teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher" (Luke 6:40)

Deuteronomy 4:9
"Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as you live.  Teach them to your children and to their children after them."  (Deuteronomy 4:9

Sibling Rivalry

Last night I had a rather serious conversation with my 6-yr old son AS.

Lately, I notice that AS tends to complain whenever I call him or ask him to do something.

I just reminded him beforehand that after watching a particular t.v. show he should then go to bed right after.  Reminders prepare him of what to expect rather than receiving an absolute command in "shock".  Nevertheless, I would still likely hear whines, excuses and whatnots from him.  I would then find myself lecturing him about complaining and being grateful.

While preparing his bedtime milk, I got the chance to ask him what he feels about me, his dad and his 1-yr old brother SC.  He said he doesn't like SC and that he is "sick" (the term he used) of him.  He also expressed that he feels I don't love him anymore or that I love SC more. He goes on to say that I am always taking care of SC..  He said he catches us doting on SC only and not him.. that I used to play with him before but not anymore.  That time, I was trying so hard in containing myself from interrupting. I wanted to defend myself.

He continued on saying that I spank him too hard.  He feels exasperated whenever I tell him to "do this, do that" (nag).  He also compared me with his dad; that DS takes him out to movies, brings him to work, while I, do not spend time with him daw.  SIGH!

I remember the line Vilma Santos said in her movie "ANAK":    “Bakit pag ang lalake ang nagbigay ng damit, pagkain sasabihin ng mga tao “Aba mabuti siyang ama” pero pag ang babae, kasama na pati pusot kaluluwa hindi pa rin sapat.”

With that, I would like to commend my husband for his intentional efforts in spending time with AS. Yay!

Going back, I asked him if he loves his brother.  He said no.  (his perception during that emotional state)
I reminded him that he was the one who wished and prayed to God for a baby brother.  (His frustration was that SC was too small to be his playmate)
I asked him, "So what are we going to do? Do you want to give him away?" (I realized I answered my own question very inappropriately, quite sarcastically.  My mistake. )
Too smart, he replied : "Will you really do what I will answer?
I was caught in my own trap.

I explained to him that what he is thinking about me not loving him anymore is not true.  I also apologized if he felt that way and explained that I am just one person and there are three of them who each needs attention.  I also thanked him for his openness and honesty in telling me all these things.

It is becoming quite a challenge to maintain peace between brothers with a five-year age gap.  AS is a very active boy, who is big with his movements.  He is an extrovert who loves meeting people and is not scared to be left off by himself.  SC on the other hand is rather observant, contented in tinkering with objects, attentive to details.  He is sensitive to people and environment.  So when AS would bear hug his brother, the other would cry in agitation, squirming his way out.  Both are frustrated.  By instinct (or by habit?) I would react by protecting the weaker sibling...  a recipe for jealousy!

They have different needs, different interests.  The challenge lies in how we as parents would embrace their differences and find balance.

Things I realized:
1.  AS (and even little SC) catches on what we do and not what we teach. Unknowingly or unconsciously, he probably hears us complain too.

2.  Change.  If I want to change somebody, I should start by changing myself.  This is one of the things I learned during our recent Holy Week Family Camp.  God is our hope for change; He can transform lives; just as He alone can wash away our sins, forgive us and make us new.  How can I do this?  Through prayer, and lots of it.

3.  Set one on one dates with my sons (and spouse) depending on their interests.  Quality time doesn't mean being in one room together yet doing things individually.  While they are still young and have different needs, this is something we can do for the meantime.  In this way, each of the boys will feel special and loved equally.  Of course, this does not mean we cannot do other things as a family.  

4. Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to get angry. James 1:19  I should learn not to react quickly to every squabble.  Yes, being the mom-referee is not easy.

After all these, I must say that PRAYER is the key to keep our family from falling apart.

Before going to bed, I led him to the crib where SC was sleeping.  I asked him to look at his brother for a few minutes.  I asked him: "Do you love your brother?"

SC: "I love him!"

Snow White and Prince Charming

This was my book when I was still a little girl.  My mom found it several months ago stashed away in her storage room.

I was wondering how do little boys learn about classic "girly" princesses stories when we as parents do not intentionally buy girly story books to them since of course, they are boys, unless you have a son and a daughter.

Anyway, I began to introduce this book to AS.  I read it to him last night.

We came across this part of the book that read:

Snow White looked into the well and murmured, "I wish that my prince would come."
No sooner had she spoken these words than a handsome young Prince appeared at her side. 
"Princess, you are even more beautiful than in my dreams.  Will you be mine?" (Agad-agad?? Di pwedeng ligaw muna??)
"Oh yes!" replied Snow White.  "I was waiting for you."  (hello?? sagot agad?! ngayon lang kayo nagkakilala... PBB teens?)


So I began to explain to AS what these mean.

Mom :  "Do you know why Snow White was wishing and waiting for Prince Charming?"

AS : "No.."

Mom : "Because it is every girl's, well most girl's dream to find the right husband for her, to become a mom to her own babies, to raise a family.
But there is a right time to get married.  Right now, you are still small.  You need to grow up first. You need to study well to gain knowledge so that when you are already an adult, you can work and earn money for yourself.  That is the right time for you to marry so you can provide food and money for your family."

AS was just listening.


The Prince came to see her everyday at the same hour.
There beside the well they made plans.  "I shall ask the King your father, if we can get married," said prince Charming. 

I paused to explain again.  "Now what the Prince did was good.  He asked permission from Snow White's parents first.  You know, before Daddy married Mom he also asked permission from Gwakong and Gwama first.  That is showing respect.  That is being a gentleman.  When you are old enough to marry, you should also ask permission from the parents.  And also, you need to pray to God to give you the right girl for you to marry."

AS :  "I don't want to pray for the right girl!  I only want to be with you...."

Awww.. =)

Although it feels good as I am savoring this season in his life where I'm the only girl in his life, but at the same time, I'm bracing myself for the inevitable.  The turbulent teenage years... where peer pressure, dating, promiscuity, and a lot more, begin.


No matter how much I try to protect him from the negative influences of the world, I cannot.  I sincerely believe that it is through parental involvement in our kids' lives, values formation early on and intentionally praying for our kids daily can we find peace and protection in God's hands. We as parents can only do so much in teaching, guiding and training them, the rest we leave it all to God.  I pray that AS will grow in the fear of the Lord.

"The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. -Proverbs 9:10 "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." -Proverbs 22:6